You work out of a Hotel?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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