is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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