..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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