Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
