brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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