Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
