Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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