I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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