I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
