when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
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I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
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I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
So. Much. Porn.