When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize