I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
it's great music for shaving your balls
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
