If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize