After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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