if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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