was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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