so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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