Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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