i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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