Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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