Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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