Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Randomize
