it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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