lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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