i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
