Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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