When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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