I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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