I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She's the barista slut.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
