quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
