Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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