Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
