She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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