To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
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My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
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just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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