hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Can you repeat that, but with context?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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