I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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