Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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