someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
