your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
