Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
