i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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