I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
