Dignity is for republicans.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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