the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize