absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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