i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
