Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
