i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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