we're blogging at a bar
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
