there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
